Friday, December 23, 2011
Sunday, November 6, 2011
Sunday, October 23, 2011
I traded 2 days of travel for an adventure between the Sea and Sky. I spent many hours in airports and airplanes, so to visit my incredible friends on the west coast, and one hell of an amazing city. As I flew across the country last week...over mountains and prairies, through cumulus clouds and time zones...I thought about the trade off.
If we place the highest worth on those things that are most precious and impossible to duplicate, then the expense of our time should have the highest trading value in our lives.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Friday, September 30, 2011
Sunday, September 18, 2011
The sidewalks I skipped down...the cracks I leaped over so to not break my mothers back... they all absorbed the imprint of my childhood. The towering maple tree in the front yard of our familes house that has a well worn branch from our tire swing...it's still there. I wasn't thinking then about what I was leaving behind, I was powerlessly flung into my future and somehow feel like I woke up in my mid thirties...back where it all began.
Resistance to the familiar and to your own history is pretty normal, I like to think. Most people want to spread their wings and venture towards the unclear horizon...and towards where they think their future lies. I have always wanted to go out and find life...make big things happen, and quietly, and introspectively marvel at quite humble beginnings. This has perhaps been with the notion in mind that surely, I won't come back to where I came from. I will escape and close the chapters of a biting, bittersweet past...and I will be done.
And here I am. Back in the city that taught me all I needed to know..about life, about family...about joy, disappointment and resolution. It's all here...and I am conscious of the peace I feel right now, to be home. No street is unfamiliar. I see people I know regularly. My memories live between the earth and the sky here...airborn and landing everyday like they were waiting for the moment I returned.
I am watched over by a deeply kindred spirit. I think of him...and feel him present on the pavements here like nowhere else. I sometimes think if I look closely enough I will see his footprints fade in front of me, like watery impressions on a sandy shore ..and in every Tim Horton's drive thru between here and the highway. He is here...and I feel like I have more of him closeby now as I drive past the indelible imprints of our friendship in this city, and can look out my bedroom window to a church he frequented.
Back where I began. I am watching Treehouse with my niece and nephew...and banana muffins are in the oven...the air is cool, the sun is setting into lavender and coral ribbons, and tomorrow is a school day. A well placed quote, to sum up my life in this moment,
"The wheel is come full circle." William Shakespeare
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Saturday, June 25, 2011
"Don't you realise that the sea is the home of water? All water is off on a journey unless it's in the sea, and it's homesick and bound to make its way home someday." ~Zora Neale Hurston
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
It breaks off. It falls quickly...at a rapid unforgiving speed. It hits the frigid water, and cuts beneath the murky depths of the tide. It is jagged and sharp and asks no forgiveness of someone who may step on it, or catch an elbow on it as they dive into the depths. It is unapologetically real...it sticks out, and waits.
It is grief. It is change...it is a stone.
An interesting understanding has graced me in the last weeks and days. Time has a way of refining the hurts in life. Of course...everyone has heard that "time heals all wounds". I think that's a patronizing statement in the thick of a crisis. It means nothing as a giant stands on your expectations of life...or laughs haughtily at an incomprehensible loss. But as time separates you from the confusion of the puzzle...it gently assembles your life back together...corner to corner...piece by piece.
Time is like sand against that stone in the sea. At first, surely, that stone will cause harm and inflict pain on whoever crosses its path, for it is freshly separated from its base. The separation by nature has caused it to tumble and shatter...out of control until it lodges in a place where the weathering can begin. That stone will defiantly lodge in the mud...it will strike unexpectedly to passersby...causing a wound... leaving a scar. But with each touch...with each grain that swirls around it...with each ebb of the tide, it will change, it will diminish. The bladed edges will melt..and it will become something new.
Someday... it will be a smooth, glasslike thing of beauty. It will have a history, it will have a million untold stories of contact. Each interaction will shift that instrument of pain into a cool glistening and polished gem of sorts.
Perhaps, someday... that stone will find itself on a fireplace mantle...or maybe on a beautiful coffee table. It could very easily work as a paper weight in an office...or as a door stop in a bedroom.
Time will refine those pains in life that injure us. It will carve out a softer, more peaceful identity for each and every one. That peace will come over time...over the days, over the tides of life. It will manifest in understanding, or at the very least... surrendered acceptance. As for the stone, it is still what it has always been...a stone. But now it's found beauty, and purpose. For it has changed forever all that has touched it....and all that it has touched.
Tuesday, April 26, 2011
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Friday, April 1, 2011
Friday, March 18, 2011
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Sunday, January 9, 2011