The road has arrived. The spinning, unsettled wandering has halted. You have caught your balance, steadied your stance, fixed your eyes on a point on the horizon...and you have begun. Begun to walk.
The lost? It's over.
The hurt? It's dying...and being compensated with unending fullfillment.
The anger? It doesn't have to protect you anymore...you can lay it down and let complete healing begin.
The life you have known, the past that chased you for so long, and pursued you with the intention of consuming you...it's finished. Those hard edges that provided an insurance of sorts...a sure fire way of keeping good out, they're slowly chipping away...crumbling and revealing what they have been so carefully concealing...
An immeasurably valuable masterpiece.
Don't be afraid, dear one. You're braver than you even know. You're infinitely stronger than you could ever fathom. I promise you that your life is out in front of you...and not behind you. All of the underground wishes in the deepest part of your heart for the life you want- they're out there and they're now pursuing you. You'll be amazed. Those things that have made your heart hopelessly thirsty...those real desires for an extraordinary life...they'll creep in, one by one.
And you'll be ready.
Feel it all. Don't run from the real. Take your stance. Whether it be on your tiptoes reaching, looking your demons in the eye and being able to conclusively dismiss them...or on your knees, mindful of the fact that you've layed down the biggest battle of your life...and in doing so...you've won. Feel it. Don't wish away the process. Embrace the fragile beauty of brokenness. Spark those dry and whithered parts inside, and set ablaze all of the pain, crippling disappointment and unending defeat.
The rebuild is now. The ashes are glowing...and the phoenix is emerging.
We're imeasurably blessed to bear witness to it.
J. & T.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Close your eyes....hard. Cross your fingers...tight. Take a deep breath...fully. Exhale slowly.
It's in those moments of decision, that I believe, your life is created...right in front of your eyes. It doesn't mean it's clear. Not by a long, random shot. But it does mean that you've somehow flung faith out like a boomerang...and have begun to see the comeback.
It's also about doing those things that make little, to no sense to others. It's about surviving brutal scrutiny, mere patches of support, and championing what appears to be a lost or losing cause. It's doing what is non negotiable to you...at the risk of being inauthentic to your convictions for the rest of your life.
Being an innovator can be a lonely venture. Surveillance of actions and behaviours seem to be more scrutinized than any normal, daily activity. Why? Because it's not expected behaviour. It's following your heart while wielding a blade that clears the brush of a completely untrodden path. The excitement of discovery is exhilarating...the work is tireless...but it's worth it. It's all worth it, because it's a masterpiece in the making. What it is, is undecided....until the decision begs being made...and YOU make it.
My journey is as much on the outside, as the inside. My work has found me...my passion has been ignited. I challenge you to find something that makes you feel useful, to feel purposeful...and to feel gloriously alight. So many people talk about finding their purpose...and I am solely convinced....
You don't find your purpose...it's on the inside of you, and is waiting to be detonated.
The first step?
The first step?
Is one of the best ways to feel ultimately ALIVE.