Tuesday, September 7, 2010

The BUFF and the Grenade

People never cease to amaze me. A great deal of the time, the things that amaze me are the brilliant things people do for each other. Sometimes, on the opposite side of that swinging pendulum, I am awe struck at the things people DO to each other.

Have you heard of grenades and landmines? Sure you have...ongoing war in Afghanistan, daily bombings in Baghdad..WWII. Grenades and landmines have taken on a new spin in recent months...but seem to deliver the same kind of damage as those used as fatal weapons.

A wildly popular reality show has quietly crept its lingo into popular vocabulary. These kids from a Shore somewhere south of NYC have created a new language. They have degraded human beings, specifically women into two categories...grenades and landmines.

"A grenade is a girl who is quite frankly, not hot. Not to say that the girl is ugly, but she just doesn't measure up to our qualifications of attractiveness. Basically, this girl is a bomb about to go off. A landmine is like a grenade but is usually thin or petite and you don't realise she is a landmine until you realise you want someone better looking". Pauly D.- Jersey Shore
(Btw...that quote needed to have punctuation and grammar corrected in it before I posted it. It seems Pauly D. isn't that bright).

Seriously? Are you kidding me? This is the kind of grading system we are using these days, and allowing our children to emulate?

The reason I am so fired up about this is this: an ugly guy I know dropped this phrase the other day. See...I used an old school word...UGLY. He could be a model on the cover of Men's Health Magazine, but to me? UGLY..repulsive as a matter of fact. (btw- he's no cover model).

Here is why...I read a blog tonight from a lovely, sweet girl who is on an amazing weight loss journey. I applaud her. I believe in her...I want her to be all that she has hoped to be. She recalled an incident while out with her thin girlfriends. She was innocently out at a bar...having a good night. She said she was insecure even in that moment, as these friends of hers don't struggle with their weight. A group of hot guys approached the table..and began to laugh as they got closer. When the girls asked what was so funny, the response was unbelievable..." Your table just proved there is a BUFF in every group of girls". When they inevitably asked for a breakdown of just what a "BUFF" is, this was the response.." Big Ugly Fat Friend".

I have NO words.

Words hurt. Words burrow themselves into your psyche, and paralyse you when you least expect it. She said this incident happened years ago..and she hasn't gone out again. To prey on someone unexpecting, and obviously different than the crowd is just cowardly..cruel, and should be punishable.

So the next time you see someone who isn't appealing to you...or someone who rubs you the wrong way..maybe think twice about what made them the way they are. Exercise your mind to think beyond their exterior, and to the person they really are. I'm trying...everyday...I hope you will too.

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