I am wrestling with this post. I've been bothered all day about this one...but I know it needs to go out there...even if it's just for me to get it off of my chest.
Monday morning this week started very early. I was on the road at 6:45am, heading into the city for an event for work. I actually don't spite the occasional predawn morning when I have to hit the road...I drive east, and I see the sun come up. The world is quiet...peaceful and fresh.
As I hit traffic slowing down about 20 minutes from my home, (trust me, this is just the way of it...heading into Toronto in the morning is not for the faint of heart or the impatient) I looked to my left, as something unusual caught my peripheral. There, sitting on the hard, concrete median, was a rabbit. I am sure my face wound into an immediate look of perplexity and disbelief. It's face was intense...it's eyes darting against the fast moving traffic going westbound. This rabbit was trapped. I am sure it had crossed in the wee small hours of the morning, when there was little risk...when there was an open road, and no four wheeled predators to snuff out its life. The choice this wee furry one had to make now was one of three things:
1. Take a chance now..run into traffic, try to escape without being scathed.
2. Wait...wait all day if necessary. Wait until the conditions were the same as the time it crossed in the first place.
3. Travel east or west...try to find a break in traffic, or try to find a bridge. Even if it takes hours...the journey will likely ensure that life is preserved, even if its a rough and exhausting quest.
I haven't been able to get the parallel nature of this story out of my head...that damn rabbit has been haunting my mind for 48 hours. How often do we get into something, darting forward when there is little possibility for harm, to find that where we ended up is a very scary, unpredictable place? That place we ended up was new and exciting and a little risky...until the time crept forward, and brought out the eighteen wheelers, and all of the unexpected dangers we never thought about?
I tend to think...intuition is that thing you must follow. Your gut feeling is your road map. That your attempts to get to those new places, sometimes isn't a journey worth the destination. Of course, I am not saying to not try anything new...I'm not implying that meeting new people, and seeing new places isn't a worthwhile journey...but I think, if you were honest, as I am trying to be everyday...we KNOW what is right for us, and when.
Sometimes, we have to wait out the traffic until there is a safe crossing. Sometimes, we have to head in an unexpected direction to find a new path that will be unpredictable, but will be away from the traffic that gradually increased, until safety was futile.
I'd love to tell you that this story has a happy ending. But I saw that sweet rabbit this morning, lifeless on the side of the road....a casualty of choice. My heart sank, but I knew in my mind when I saw it there on Monday morning...this would be the unfortunate, inevitable end to the story. That rabbit didn't have the mindpower to think about it's choices, and how to find safety..it only saw traffic. We, as humans are blessed to have the wherewithal to think forward, and to choose from the multitude of options that lay before us. We aren't trapped...we can think things through..and we always have each other, if the lines are blurred and we need counsel.
So I choose, to be more mindful of my choices...more protective of my direction, and as always, to keep my eyes open for strange, unusual, heartbreakingly real lessons that will make me a better human being. Thank you God, for the rabbit...and the lesson.